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At the Feet of The Mother

That thou art: तत् त्वम् असि

A moth reached a congregation of fire-lamps that had been lit atop a hill. As it neared the top, it met some fireflies glowing in the darkness below. The moth being an inquisitive one asked the firefly if it had ever seen the sun. Now like the moth the firefly grew blind in the day and therefore knew not of it. But with an air of superior wisdom it declared that there was no sun since it had never seen it. Perhaps the sun was simply a tale told by some to create fear in others. For if there was one then why should not the firefly and the moth see it when they could very well see in the darkness and even light it with its flares. Little did it realise that its eyes endowed to see in the dark and accustomed only to the night cannot see the blazing Light that comes up every day. And what to the moth and the firefly is a night is to the earth at large the light of day.
The moth proceeded further and as it came very close to the fire-lamps it met a few sparks that flew out of the flames by the action of the winds. The moth repeated the question again: “Is there a sun?” And the sparks in all humility replied: “We know not of that, but we do know from where we came. It is those flames that you see out there. Perhaps they may know.” So saying they vanished as suddenly as they had appeared. Soon, guided by the sparks, the moth reached the hill top and stood close to the little lamps. One nearest to it was a small little flame that did not burn long enough to endure the night and glimpse the day. The moth repeated its question. The flame replied as if one with superior wisdom: “The sun I have seen not. I know only the stars and the moon. Perhaps it is this that they call sun or may be the sun is simply a myth, a kind of super-flame much like me, a little bigger perhaps as I may be one day.” One nearer to it that had felt the dawn but seen not the sun responded more hopefully: “I think there is something called the sun because I have felt its light and warmth spread magically over the earth. But soon after this rare glimpse, I fainted and faded till some unseen hand lit me again tonight. But I Think there is a sun since I have felt its glory and its touch. May be none can see it or know of it, yet one can feel it and sense it.”

All this while there stood amidst them a flame, erect and silent like a concentrated mass of energy and force. When the moth approached it the fire spoke not for a while. But seeing the moth’s insistence and the flames around it stand in silent expectation, it addressed the whole group thus: “Yes I have looked upon the sun since the fuel in me could withstand the burden of the long night as al do see who can thus endure. But I have learnt another secret, that what burns in the sun also burns in me, that the sun and fire are the same, one in essence, two in appearance.” Thus saying these deep words pregnant with Truth born of experience, the fire was quiet again. The little flames around lifted their arms in adoration and worship to the great fire that had revealed this great secret to them. But the moth felt an irresistible urge to jump and loose itself into the fire and thus loosing itself find the sun by seeing through the eyes of the fire. For only they who are willing to loose their self who find the Self. Only they who can die to the ego find God.

And as it leaped into the great fire one more spark jumped upward into the sky and the night began to recede as a glow lit the eastern sky.

I have objected in the past to Vairagya of the ascetic kind and the tamasic kind and by the tamasic kind I mean that spirit which comes defeated from life.