Is the time come for me to start becoming conscious of my nights? My normal sleep is filled with unconsciousness.
It does not matter much at present. Put your waking consciousness right.
The sleep-consciousness has to be changed quickly as it is a fundamental basis. Otherwise whatever is gained during the day after so much tapasya gets devoured during the night!
First you will have to get the capacity of getting it back as soon as you rise.
Most of my nights are spent in very ordinary dreams. That is why I don’t prefer to sleep much. Nineteen waking hours are passed with a close intimacy with the Mother and five hours with a close contact with the dark obscurity of the earth.
By not sleeping enough you weaken the forces of the physical consciousness — and so the physical basis of the sadhana is less strong than it should be. It gets more open to the forces of inertia.
I don’t have enough sleep nowadays. Even when I stay in bed longer it escapes me. I must have at least eight hours of sound sleep, mustn’t I?
Yes, sleep is needed — when it does not come, you should keep yourself in a very still quietude till it does. In that way there will be at any rate rest.
Someone spoke to me that when the peace descends into the inner vital much sleep is no longer necessary.
That someone announces a most dangerous doctrine. To sleep enough (not too much) is essential.
From early morning till 9.30 a.m. my consciousness has a difficult time regaining its higher station. No amount of concentration has any effect on this habit. This happens even when my nights are filled with good dreams.
It is one of the fixed habits of the subconscient which do not yield easily to pressure. One day it will go.
Even during the night I get attacks. Consequently I do not get sleep. I suppose this shows sadhana going on.
Often the attack comes in the night because it is hoped then that the consciousness will be lowered and off guard.
Getting attacks at night is not sadhana — the proper sadhana at night is sleep.
I want light during my sleep state.
It is the most difficult of all because there the conscious will is in abeyance. Sometimes the waking will can act in the sleep consciousness; but to be always conscious in sleep needs a change in the subconscient itself — in its very stuff.
A certain intensity of Force must come into the waking consciousness which will be strong enough to persist in the sleep.
Only a few days back I requested for a change of my sleep consciousness. Now the Mothers grace has responded. Bad dreams have begun to be replaced by good ones. However, I am not satisfied with that only, I want my daytime sadhana to be extended to sleep also.
It is a good step forward at any rate.
