All sorts of hostile suggestions are thrown on me from outside to create a wall between the Mother and myself!
The one thing to be avoided is all identification with these lower forces or acceptance of their suggestions — for it is only that that can really interfere with the sadhana.
As S cannot write to you on Sundays, he requests me to insert his question in my letter. Was there any general violent attack (in the Ashram atmosphere) on some sadhaks? Are we not rather in a difficult period of sadhana?
I am unaware of a special new condition of things. The difficult period began long ago and even that is only an intensification of old difficulties, nothing new.
But attacks have long been there. The atmosphere is sometimes thick with them, sometimes clear to some extent.
I feel as if some furious forces have either entered or come up in the general nature. Is it so?
Yes, it is true — the general attack has deepened.
There is an intimation that at present you are working directly with the supramental Power. That is why the resistance here is so stormy and the attacks violent. Is it true?
I suppose so. Only that must not be accepted as a reason for passive acquiescence.
Every first of the month at a particular hour my general consciousness is pulled down from the heights. What is the cause of such a regular habit?
There are always these formed habits of the subconscient — originally there may have been some vital or other reason, afterwards it is only the habit of lending part of the consciousness to the old movement.
In the morning I wrote to you that I had got out of the dark field of suggestions and attacks. But in the evening the whole thing came back. Why so?
It is nothing more than what I told you — the suggestion of the adverse Force and a mechanical habit of response in the outer consciousness during the periods when it is not lifted up and exalted. Even in such intensity it must be able to reject these things.
The suggestions say that because of my present bad condition the Mother is really displeased with me and has changed her attitude towards me. How to deal with such strong and insistent suggestions?
All that is quite irrational and groundless. There is no displeasure and no change in the Mother. You must yourself reject these things. To parley and discuss with an irrational outer vital is useless — a flat and downright rejection of its suggestions is the only course.
The whole thing is a suggestion of the vital forces and has no reality — so long as you listen to these suggestions they will naturally go on and obstruct your sadhana with vital desires and vital dissatisfaction.
Don’t admit them. Turn your attention upward for the Force to descend.
Some time back I informed you that every first day of the month I get an attack of adverse suggestions. Why does the difficulty linger so long?
The attack on the first is only a bad habit of the physical consciousness due to a long standing association in the mind which you ought to get rid of.
Why am I singled out by the difficulties? Any error on my part?
Everybody has his full share of difficulties, except those who do not mind what difficulties they have.
Difficulties come from the old nature trying to rise up — they need not be the result of any error.
What is this struggle really about?
It is between the old lower nature supported by the hostile forces and the new consciousness that began to descend — the struggle is always that.
You say the struggle is between the old and the new consciousness. But then what is special in it now? Does it not begin from the beginning of the sadhana and continue till the sadhana is completed? Whether it is active or passive, strong or weak is a different matter.
That makes all the difference. Besides everybody does not have the struggle, though most pass through it.
You used the word ‘most’ and not ‘all’, which would mean that there are some who do not even need to pass through the difficulties. What is special in those few lucky ones?
It is something in their nature that is poised, calm, open, refusing to let the Nature forces disturb their settled inner attitude, clear mind and will and strong balance. Also a prominent psychic with a quiet vital and a clear physical mind will ensure a calm progress.
How to be free from these difficulties?
If the peace of the higher self and the force from these higher levels or the Knowledge that is there descends sufficiently.
The suggestions seem to be frequently with you and the acceptance of the inertia and the unwillingness or inability to supply a steady will also. Under these conditions the oscillation of the consciousness between experience and a depressed state is inevitable. Even when the condition is good, it is not possible to keep the consciousness always at the same height, but then the depression does not come.
How to explain the simultaneous occurrence of the experiences and depression?
They take place in part of the being — the depression and struggle belong to another part.
Inertia, dissatisfaction, depression! What should be done against them except to refuse to harbour them and use the will steadily against them?
It is a part of your being that responds to the suggestions — otherwise they would have no power over you. You would feel them separate and unable to stop your progress.
What is the solution and how to get out of this mess?
There is only one solution and that is to refuse to accept all these suggestions and to use your will against them with an absolute determination to get rid of them.
Keep your faith, call in the Mother’s Power.
The thing you can do is not to remain passive, to refuse to identify any part of your being with these things and to reject it all with decision and force and to allow constantly the Mother’s Power.
What is the present stage which has deprived me of all my peace and joy? I feel no interest for the sadhana or even for the outer work. Whatever help and protection the Mother sends me stops before it can enter into me. What is the reason for all that?
The reason is quite clear from what you write. There is something in the consciousness that wanted the letters and answers not simply for the help in sadhana but as a personal satisfaction with egoistic elements in it. Also it wanted nice, pleasing and elaborate answers. All that is the usual wrong attitude of the vital which is the stumbling-block for so many sadhaks and prevents true psychic love from developing, replacing it by the vital kind full of demand, ego, jealousy, revolt etc. and it has been the ruin of some. All that you had thrown out of the higher parts and quieted it elsewhere, but it remained sticking somewhere and when correspondence was suspended, the hostile forces took advantage of the fact that you were not allowed to write every day as before to raise up these feelings and you did not repel them with sufficient force to put an end to the attack. Hence they continue.
I could bear anything with equality except this stopping of the sadhana. I feel it like a deep wound in my heart. Without it how can I get back my peace and silence and a relief from the heavy fatigue which the lower forces and the hostile attacks impose on me?
How can you have peace and quiet when you are always thinking of “lower forces” and “attacks” and “possessions” etc. If you can look at things naturally and quietly, then only you can have quiet and peace.
The worst thing for sadhana is to get into a morbid condition, always thinking of lower forces, attacks etc. If the sadhana has stopped for a time, then let it stop, remain quiet, do ordinary things, rest when rest is needed — wait till the physical consciousness is ready. My own sadhana when it was far more advanced than yours used to stop for half a year together. I did not make a fuss about it, but remained quiet till the empty or dull period was over.
From your recent answers I now deduce that I have been misusing the terms “lower forces” and “hostile forces”. What exactly is the difference between the two?
There are natural movements of the ordinary human nature in the material consciousness which take time to get rid of. Of course we call them forces of the lower nature but one must not regard them as hostile, but only ordinary. They have to be changed but it usually takes time and it can be done quietly. One must be more occupied with the positive side of the sadhana than with them. If one is always thinking of them as hostile things, getting disturbed when they come, considering them as hostile possessions, then it is not good.
The things that are really hostile are few and must be distinguished from the ordinary movements of the nature. The first must be repelled, the second dealt with quietly and without getting troubled or discouraged by their appearances.
I have decided to give full rest to the body. May I now resume the sadhana without taxing the physical?
There is no objection to doing the sadhana, but it must be done quietly without this constant struggle and disquietude — not minding if it takes time, not getting into a constant rhythm of struggling against difficulties. That is my point.
You have to recover the energy and power of the will.
In pulling down the sadhana what are the forces at work — the hostile or only the lower?
It is the lower forces at work; but the Hostiles are there behind pushing and ready to take advantage if they find the sadhak accepting or identifying himself with the suggestions. That is why one must be immediately on guard if there is the least movement towards any such thing.
After recovering from the critical period of darkness (attacks, depression, helplessness etc.) this fact comes out: I have exaggerated rather too much my difficulties. The adverse forces seem to have used a double method to regain their lost territory. First they got in by the back-door and when they were thrown out they used the second: throwing in suggestions, suggestions of depression for having allowed them to get in in the first place!
That is the real truth of the matter. They are small things in a small part of the nature, which become big in appearance only because they are given an undue importance.
The adverse beings pointing out partiality in the Guru will gradually lead the sadhak to revolt and that will bring a fall and a full stop to his sadhana.
Yes, that is their aim — for it is their one short cut to success, to separate the sadhak from his soul.
Today for the first time inertia invaded the body. That means the whole being is now affected by it. There seems to be some possibility of the passive resistance becoming active. Is the subconscient also involved in this trouble?
I have explained to you already that the being (outer mind, vital etc.) is still capable of responding to the suggestions that rise from the subconscient. If it were not so the suggestions would be felt as perfectly foreign to you and there would be no question of any possibility of the passive resistance becoming active.
Mere passivity does not seem likely to succeed, it could only do so if it brought the Force down, but the passivity is too tamasic to do that.
The difficulty is due to old habits of the physical mind and vital which still have the power to repeat themselves by rising from the subconscient and as your physical mind and vital still respond you are not able to stop the disquietude. When they respond no longer then there will be no disquietude.
Now I see that one has to accept a period of no-effort in spite of having the knowledge. Can one still make the effort?
The period of no-effort is usually when the physical consciousness is uppermost, for the nature of that is inertia, to be moved by the higher forces or to be moved by the lower forces or by any forces but not to move itself. One must still use one’s effort if one can, but the great thing is to be able to call down the force from above into the physical — otherwise to remain perfectly quiet and undisturbed, expect its coming.
We should know that often the adverse forces magnify our difficulty by their mere power of suggestion. They now tell me it is impossible to come out dynamically.
Yes, it is that. The suggestion is put in order to discourage the dynamic effort and keep one in the passive.
How to come out of such a powerful suggestion?
It is difficult to get rid of a suggestion when the consciousness itself accepts it. The idea of helplessness, of not being able to reject has to go.
How long will this dark period last?
All depends on how you take it. If you get discouraged simply thinking “things are getting worse and worse,” it will remain a long time.
Sometimes it happens that certain general functions of the Ashram, instead of becoming an occasion for joy and happiness, make us rather unhappy. This must be due to something wrong in us of which we are not aware as yet.
It is the old vital with its ego which comes up again and again. It refuses to follow the higher being and be as the true bhaktas who ask nothing and are content with all that the Mother does or does not do, because whatever she does must be good, since she is the Mother.
I am aware that there is a small part somewhere in me which keeps itself aloof from the present working of the transformation. It harps on its egoistic attitude — “unless the Divine loves me I cannot love Him.”
Is it a part of your nature that clings to these things or is it a movement of the general nature which forces itself in and the truer tendency in this part is overpowered for the time by the invasion? If it is an invasion the will and the psychic must attack it and fling it out. If it is a part of your nature that is unchanged, the light of the psychic and of the higher consciousness must press on it to change its attitude.
What should be our proper attitude when confronted with obstructions, attacks and revolts on the way?
Keep yourself separate always from all attack and revolt, regarding it steadily as the not-I — for these things do not belong to the true self, the true being.
This afternoon I met H. A short talk with him had a profound effect on me as he is always full of the Mother’s love and joy which he spontaneously communicates to others. But after sometime I was annoyed and depressed with myself because I could not receive the Mother’s love and joy in the same way at this stage of my sadhana.
There is no need for sadness. Everyone has his difficulties and it is a mistake to desire the state of another.[1] One must follow the movement of one’s own heart and self and psychic without looking elsewhere.
If nothing in your mind identified with the vital (it need not be the whole mind) the suggestions would not interfere so seriously nor would you feel them as your own at all. They would present themselves as things passing through or rising and falling away. There must certainly be something in the physical mind that accepts and probably affects the vital mind also.
From my personal experience I make a general statement on how to face a period of adverse suggestions and attacks. (1) Carry on with faith and surrender. This guards us from any danger or serious fall. (2) Whatever the Gurudeva does is for the best. (3) Give all and ask for nothing. (4) Do not waver regarding the goal we have accepted.
All the methods are quite the right ones. If one has these things fixed in the attitude or even some of them, then one cannot fall — on the contrary each attack will leave one more forward and stronger than before.
I am told that when the struggle is strong there intervene some forces of light against the ego and the vital being. May I be told what forces of light are concerned with my present condition?
Forces that try to bring the true consciousness and to replace these stupidities of the ordinary vital nature (ego, sex, jealousy, envy etc.).
The intervention of these forces is from above (and therefore conditional). But do not our individual souls or jivatmans do something when such powerful struggles are going on in their instrumental being?
They usually do if the personal will makes itself their instrument.
Can we not turn the attacks into a help in our progress?
It is true that if one has the true basis, then after every attack one finds oneself further advanced in progress.
[1] I soon found out that H’s difficulties were much more serious than those of many of us. Finally he left the Ashram for good.
